I think we are getting lost in terms and definitions.
To me a gasket is flat usually with holes for fasteners.
A seal is something I think of as running on a revolving part such as a rear main seal or a wheel bearing seal. These should be prelubed on the surface that meets the moving part.
O-rings are installed lubricated, usually with grease or some lubricant compatible with the system you are working on. O-rings need to be cut free and lubricant helps keep them free from damage inflicted by a burr at installation.
When you get into spark plugs on overhead cam engines you run into a host of various designs that allow the plug to screw into the head without oil leaking. Things at this location made of rubber, things you want to get apart again without damage like spark plug boots, are lubricated with silicon grease.
In general, if the seal stays in place and doesn’t leak, you did it right.
Technicians often have special opinions about how gaskets should be installed and this basically boils down to the fact that they don’t like using a gasket scraper because it costs them time. They also don’t like RTV for this reason.